Thursday Night is Katherine’s Testimony!
We had one day gotten too high and too paranoid to go drop off our rent check. A check written by my mother in law who knew a little of what was going on but was trying to make sure my children were safe.
After finally leaving with my kids one night to go stay with my father in law I felt sick. I was being a hypocrite and all I wanted was someone to come rescue me. I needed security in this unsafe place. I needed to be safe from me and my thoughts. At the depths of my last drug binge we lied about going to retrieve items from our house. Came back and the next morning DCF was at my hotel door.
I was so angry. In my addict brain I could not understand how anyone could say my kids were in harm’s way. In the midst of this investigation my husband was arrested. My hole just got a little deeper and whole lot darker. Shortly after his arrest I got into a fight with my father in law about spending my tax refund at his discretion. So he kicked me out. I took the 2 duffle bags, which contained everything left I owned, packed it up again and found an efficiency motel down the road so I could get Jacob back and forth to his school. My kids and I lived in that motel for three weeks. And it was there in that freezing motel room at the end of February that I hit my knees. Not really knowing at all what I was asking for or even who I was supposed to be asking it to…….
Recovery for me has been a journey to say the least. My “rock bottom” hasn’t been a one and done kind of place. But here, in this room and at Celebrate Recovery I have found the voice I needed in each of the area’s that I struggle. I have found the support to pray for me when I am hurting. I have been shown how to place healthy boundaries in my life to protect myself. And most importantly I have found the best of friends. The one’s that I call at 1 a.m when I just can’t sleep because I feel like my life is spiraling out of control with triggers. It’s nice to have accountability partners that are nurses and work the night shift. The people in Celebrate Recovery have become my family. They love my children, and my husband, and have truly become the greatest support in my recovery.
Principle 4: Openly examine and confess my faults to myself, to God, and to someone I trust.
“Happy are the pure in heart.” Matthew 5:8
Step 4: We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
“Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the LORD.” Lamentations 3:40
Thursday Night’s Dinner: Cindy is cooking.
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